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Ask Your Hairdresser for a New ‘Do, Not for Dating Advice

It’s an old trope, a cliché as old as hairdressers themselves, probably—the act of confessing to your stylist all the woes of your love life and then listening to their advice, given as you get a root touch-up or the big chop. I’ve done it. My friends do it. You’ve done it. But it’s a bad habit. If your hairdresser is a friend or family member or if you’ve known each other for years, then many of these rules don’t apply. Otherwise, well … maybe stick to asking your hairdresser about flattering cuts, not whom to date or how to play the game.

You Can Only Share So Much Between Appointments

Unless you’re super close, you’re one of a huge number. You get your hair done, what, every six weeks? Gasp, or longer every 3 months? There’s not much time to share anything except all the biggest drama. Also, hey, you’re memorable—of course, you are—but your hairdresser has so many other people in that chair between your visits. What if they’re giving you advice based on someone else’s relationship because they mixed up the details? They could tell you to drop a hot catch because of someone else’s crazy story.

Your Stylist Isn’t Really Invested in Your Love Life

For reasons similar to those above, your hairdresser has zero stakes in your love life—unless they get to do your hair for all the big milestones of your relationship, of course. For the most part, however, your dating life has no effect on them. That doesn’t mean your hairdresser doesn’t genuinely wish you well; they probably have fantastic intentions. It just means that there’s no reason for them to delve more deeply into your relationship so that they can offer anything other than a few fluffy pieces of Cosmo-based advice.

It Pays to Tell You What You Want to Hear—Literally

No matter what, at the moment when you are in your stylist’s chair, you are the client, and the stylist is the service provider. Customers sometimes take it out on their service workers when they hear something they don’t like or don’t want to acknowledge. Your stylist probably isn’t going to tell you to leave a douche canoe if it sounds like you’re head over heels in love with that person. Why? Because it might have a financial effect—the tip you leave—and, well, unhappy customers are increasingly known for sharing review rants all over social media. That’s bad for business.

You Can Get Perspective Without Taking Advice

It’s always good to get perspective, provided you keep those views in context. You can ask for your stylist’s take on a situation in your love life, just bear in mind that you don’t have to take their advice unless you honestly believe it applies to your situation. If it doesn’t apply, let it fly—a great motto for opinions.

An Opinion is Just an Opinion

On the subject of opinions, everyone has them. That doesn’t mean you have to listen to them. Your stylist may swear up and down that you’d look phenomenal with neon pink hair, but if your instincts tell you differently, listen to them. The same goes for dating advice. You don’t have to take anyone’s opinion as the holy gospel, even if you ask for it.

Do You Ask Your Server for Advice, Too?

Once more, as you sit at your hairdresser’s station, you are the customer, and they are currently providing you with a service. Asking for advice about something intimate or personal is awkward sometimes. Are you going to ask your waiter what to do about the guy you just met on You shouldn’t, by the way, unless said waiter is helping you get out of a bad date you’re stuck on.

In the end, it’s entirely your choice who you ask for advice. After all, there are only so many things to talk about as you sit in the chair, and it’s easy to open up to acquaintances and strangers—often because they don’t know every little thing about your life. While your stylist might provide on-point advice for casual dating situations, you might want to avoid seeking your hairdresser’s help for your serious relationship issues.